Since the girls from Kamehameha are so much more hotter then the mainland, Kimo decided to skip Harvard, and raise mongooses behind Akahi instead. (6)
1. “Since” connotes time passing; “Because” relates to cause and effect.
2. If possible, keep the verb tense consistent. s
3. “more hotter” is redundant; “hotter” is the proper comparative.
4. The adverb “then” should be the conjunction “than.”
5. We have a parallel structure problem; we can’t compare Kamehameha girls to the mainland.
6. No comma is required in a compound infinitive.